I’ve been nervous all week
It makes sense. I’m on my way to the biggest competition I’ve been to in over a decade, with higher hopes than ever before — as much as I try to control my expectations, my mind keeps drifting to what could happen, and how great it could be.
I haven’t done the mental preparation I wanted to. I hoped to do some visualizations to get used to the feeling of being there, on strip, at a world cup (that’s what visualization does, or part of it — it acclimatizes you to the environment you’re going to be in) but I didn’t do that.
What I did do was repeatedly come back to the thought that it will be okay. I reminded myself that I’m doing this because I like it, and — even at this level — because it’s fun. I focused on the fact that my life is stable, and I have other things grounding me that are much more important in the long run than fencing. And I intentionally released my efforts to control the outcome.
When I’m under pressure I often feel locked up and tight, unable to be smooth, relaxed, or creative. Often it feels like minor details are of ultimate importance, and the slightest thing being out of place can be upsetting, even throwing off my mental state.
As I’ve practiced self-awareness I’ve come to realize my effort to control details in those moments is really me trying to control the outcome, and to control how I feel.
Both of those things are out of my hands.
I can influence the outcome, and I can can choose how to respond.
I can affect how I feel, and I can choose my perspective.
But I’m trying to control what happens around me so I don’t feel danger or discomfort, and that doesn’t work.
So, as I’m looking ahead to my first world cup in a decade — and my first after quitting the sport in frustration and then coming back to chase a childhood dream — I’m reminding myself to focus on the few things I can control, and let go of the rest.
To let it be whatever it’s going to be.
(and even as I wrote that, I could feel my body relax)
If you’re competing this weekend, good luck and have fun!
Best,
Corwin
P.S. If you’d like to make sure you do the mental preparation you need for your next competition, click here to get on my waiting list for 1-on-1 coaching.
I’ll guide you through a step-by-step process to ensure you’re as relaxed, confident, and ready as you can be.